I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
