So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
