Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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