If that was your dad, he is hot
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
