white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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