did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
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