Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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