You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
