you guys were way drunker than both of me
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
that is very illegal...i love you.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize