I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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