oh god the rape fog is back!
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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