so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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