I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Randomize
