pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
