I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
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