How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
