scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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