Someone shit on the floor
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Randomize
