You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
