Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Randomize