i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
