I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I AM VODKA MAN
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
