My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
