everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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