can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
