Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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