I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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