Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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