Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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