Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
