So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Randomize