My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
