my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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