Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
