your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize
