new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Randomize
