some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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