why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
