I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
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