yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
