Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
