put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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