we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Randomize
