I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
