Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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