Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Randomize
