i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
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