is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
