I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize