Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
