just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
What a fucking waste of an outfit
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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