the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
